I'd Shank a Bitch for You Right in the Kidney | Laughing Light Candle Collection

I'd Shank a Bitch for You Right in the Kidney Candle. With a variety of over 40 delightful scents, you can elevate your relaxation to new heights. From the calm of lavender to the invigorating aroma of coffee, Our Laughing Light Collection candles are the funniest candles you'll find online.

        Available in two sizes

• Standard sized 9 oz jar (3 x 3.5 inches) with a burn time of approximately 50+ hours 

• Small sized 4 oz jar (2 x 2.5 inches) with a burn time of approximately 20+ hours.

• 100% Coconut Soy Wax 

• 100% Cotton Wick 

• White Wax-No Coloring

• Phthalate and Toxin Free 

• Vegan and Cruelty Free 

• Hand-poured in Michigan 

• Scent: we have a fragrance for everyone, choose from 40 plus different scent

Scents are:

1. Apple Cinnamon: A rich combination of green apple, clove buds, and red hot cinnamon creates a traditional, nostalgic scent loved by many.
2. Black Ice:  A masculine and clean fragrance with a touch of musky, mossy, woodsy, and ambergris subtle florals.
3. Banana: Smells just like a freshly peeled banana.
4. Birthday Cake: Buttercream icing surrounds this delectable cake confection. A luscious vanilla cake accord is sweetened with maple syrup for a perfect birthday cake sensation.
5. Black Cherry Merlot: The fragrance begins with lively hints of black currant and apple, enhancing the heart of red wine and black cherry.
6. Blackberry Sage: The crisp essence of sage, rosemary, and mint weaves together with the succulent sweetness of ripe blackberries.
7. Blueberry Cobbler: Buttery and sugary top notes lead to a luscious core of blueberry, anchored by a base of vanilla and graham cracker crust.
8. Champagne Toast: A revitalizing scent that merges effervescent champagne with hints of berries and zesty tangerine, resulting in a fragrance that is both refreshing and sophisticated.
9. Cherry Blossom: Distant cherry blossoms mingle with magnolia and rose, complemented by delicate touches of cherry, tonka bean, and sandalwood, creating a fresh and airy fragrance with depth.
10. Chocolate Fudge: A gourmand delight with rich vanilla, creamy hazelnut, and a gooey mix of chocolate, sugar, and praline.
11. Cinnamon Candies: A year-round gourmand fragrance with the sweet warmth of cinnamon candies, infused with notes of clove leaf, cinnamon, gurjan balsam, eucalyptus, and pine.
12. Coconut: A breezy, beautiful fragrance oil that combines raw, creamed coconut with salty sea air and just a hint of amber, orange and Tonka Bean to create a beachy yet sophisticated scent.
13. Coconut Milk Lavender: An exquisite and distinct fusion of vibrant lavender, smooth coconut milk, sweet coconut shavings, and sugary vanilla.
14. Cotton Candy: A delightful mix of strawberries, raspberries, and subtle cantaloupe, wrapped in the sweetness of cotton candy.
15. Fraser Fir: Experience the true essence of Fraser Fir with a blend of cypress, lemon peel, evergreen, cedar, fir, amber, and moss.
16. French Lilac: A floral fragrance with green leaves, lily of the valley, and honeysuckle, complemented by lilacs, clean powder, and woody Amyris for a soft, romantic touch.
17. Fruit Loops: Sweet orange, tangy cherry, and sweet vanilla bean with sandalwood create this nostalgic cereal scent.
18. Fruity Pebbles: Tart lemon and sweet orange blend with gentle lavender and hints of corn cereal.
19. Fudge Brownie Latte: Enjoy a blend of rich fudge, creamy chocolate, and coffee.
20. Guava Passion Fruit: A lovely tropical blend ! An exotic fusion of tangy guava and sweet passion fruit blended with strawberry, pineapple and pear.
21. Gummy Bears: Experience the joy of childhood with the fruity scent of Yummy Gummy, reminiscent of gummy bears.
22. Hot Buttered Popcorn: A rich, fragrant scent of a batch of hot buttered popcorn.
23. Lavender and Sage: It offers sweet nuances of jasmine, ylang ylang, and herbals resting on a rich woody base of precious oud, vanilla, and leather.
24. Lavender Driftwood: Combining the timeless floral essence of lavender with masculine undertones of cypress, cedar, and amber, this fragrance oil presents a unique twist on the classic lavender scent.
25. Lavender Honey: Fragrant lavender and rich honey combined to produce a sweet and smooth floral fragrance.
26. Leather Balsam: The invigorating fragrance of balsam is perfectly blended with rich leather.
27. Lemon Pound Cake: Lively lemon peel and juicy lemon provide a citrus kick to this bakery fragrance, with a finish of butter, sugar, and vanilla for a realistic gourmand cake scent.
28. Lemon Verbena: Elevated by citrus and sugar, this fragrance centers around lemon verbena and lemongrass with a light, sweet touch.
29. Mahogany Shea: Sweet almond top note blends into nutty shea and coconut, with natural woody tones of sandalwood and cedar, all resting on a base of light musk and tonka bean.
30. Mahogany and Teakwood: Fine woods fragrances of mahogany, cedarwood and oak, highlighted by delicate lavender and geranium notes.
31. Mango and Gardenia: Balanced with coconut and peach top notes, this fruity floral fragrance is grounded by a base of light musk and tonka bean.
32. Nordic Night: Eucalyptus and lavender top notes lead to a pine-centered fragrance, resting on an herbal, woody base of rosemary, cedar, and oakmoss, ideal for candles and melts.
33. Ocean Breeze: Aquatic notes are enriched by airy ozone, while wood, violet, musk, and cotton blossom at the base provide depth, creating a uniquely extraordinary scent.
34. Orange and Patchouli: Sweet, juicy orange harmoniously blended with the distinctive, earthy notes of patchouli.
35. Peanut Butter Cup: Velvety peanut butter, sugary cinnamon, and freshly baked cookies.
36. Pink Grapefruit: A perfectly ripened Ruby Red grapefruit...sweet and bitter at the same time.
37. Rustic Lodge: A warm and masculine blend of pine with hints of cedarwood and amber.
38. Sandalwood and Rose: Asian sandalwood combined with roses and jasmine for a pleasing erotic fragrance.
39. Sea Salt & Peony: A beautiful balance of sea salt, peony, geranium, rose, and tea leaves amid fresh aquatic scents of rosewood, white cedar, and white patchouli.
40. Strawberry Shortcake: The top and middle notes of strawberry are rounded out with tangy hints of lemon and orange peel resting on a rich base of vanilla, cream, sugar, and a graham cracker crust.
41. Sugared Chestnut: Sweet and cinnamon-infused top notes blend with chestnuts and warm amaretto, anchored by a base of caramelized sugar, butter, and tonka.
42. Teakwood Citrus: The exotic scent of Amazon teakwood blended with fresh, juicy citrus fruits.
43. Very Vanilla: Hints of vanilla bean, buttercream, and cake, with a subtle touch of bourbon.
44. White Tea & Ginger: A popular combination of white tea, lemon, yuzu, clean florals, and spicy ginger.

Candle Care for Eternal Glow

• Maintain a 1/4" wick length for optimal burning.

• Encourage a full melt pool to reach the jar edges to prevent tunneling when initially lighting. 

• Stay attentive and limit the burn time to 4 hours for the organic coconut soy wax. 

• Avoid burning when wax reaches a low level of 1/4"-1/2" to prevent jar overheating towards the end.